Often, I imagine us reconnecting
At a social event in between our neighborhoods
And you're much healthier than you were,
And I am same as always except even more ready now.
You course towards me through throngs of friends and lovers
With your classic awkward grace
And keenness to show off this new development of
Being better than me, finally.
You have a part of my heart.
It's the most waxing part where all the words live.
And so I vowed to write about us never again
Then wrote about the grapevine, the dove,
The doe, the house, the meals, the trees, the car,
Los Angeles, sexual activities, wetness,
And subliminally, I was writing to you
About how I was getting on without you.
Calling your name a little bit.
Checking if you heard it, meaning you bought the book
And read it,
And I would let that suffice for talking.
You would say
Rae, it's been too long!
Yes, too long; I have been dying to know how you are.
So great! So much has happened.
And then you would tell me…
On a cold inner-city walk towards lunch,
I am trying to get to know you because it matters to me,
But you so easily skate long strides
Past antebellum trees and gimmick horse buggies.
I am winded.
I can't convey myself the way I want to.
Because we know each other, there is so much time.
We will get there. It's not going anywhere.